Four months ago I had a wake up call.
It was like someone threw ice-water on me to shake me
from my haze.
It’s amazing how a phone call can change your life.
It’s amazing how we never realize the role others have
played in our lives until they are gone.
Riley was a good friend. At one point in my high school
career, I considered him one of my best friends. He was like a big brother to
me; he called me out on my crap, annoyed me daily, but in the end was always in
my corner. He was my sarcastic partner in
crime for goofing off in back of the advanced classes and roaming about the
school when we were supposed to be in fashion or student council.
But then he graduated, and we both dated people in
different crowds, so we drifted apart. There wasn't a falling out, or a
defining moment that ended out friendship, we just simply grew apart. I would
still see him at parties or around town and we would say hi and chat, but our
lives didn't overlap anymore. Then I moved away.
It’s the same story you've heard a thousand times.
I hadn't talked to Riley, really talked, in probably four
years.
It’s hard every day to know I wasn't there for him when
he needed it. He was a good friend during some rough times in my life. I never
returned the favor.
I never realized the impact he had on me as a person
until I couldn't call him up to say thank you. Until I couldn't bridge the gap
between us and reconnect with my old friend.
I wouldn't be the person I am if he hadn't touched my
life, even though it was years ago.
He was smart and sarcastic. He was stubborn and childish.
He could make you laugh or drive you crazy in a matter of seconds. The Riley I
remember was happy.
He was a good person. He simply lost his way, and chose
to wander alone. And somewhere along the way, he forgot which way was up.
I wish I could have been there.
In a roundabout way he reminded me to do what he couldn't,
or wouldn't; to live.
He reminded me to tell people I love them. To appreciate
life. To wake up every day and remember why it’s all worth it. He also reminded
me to let people in, and let them help.
Here is a short clip of the boy I choose to remember, the
boy I choose to emulate. The one that was a good friend, and a great person.
This one is for you Ry. I’m thankful for your life, and
all the ways you have helped me, and all the lives you touched. I’ll miss you
for the rest of my life.
We all will.
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